Life Changes

For ten years off and on I have been seeing someone... It was good, it was bad.... but now, a few days before my life changing surgery, it's done. I'll miss him, I know I will, even as I write this I'm in tears, but I can't be with someone I know is sleeping with someone else. I know how it feels to be betrayed, be cheated on.... and I can't do that... but what if.... no one ever wants to be with me? Being fat my whole life shielded me from most people,  guys walk by and yell "Ewww! FAT PIG!".... but when the weight is all gone after surgery... how will I know for sure who the losers are? After this... relationship fail, how can I even trust a man again? Why would I even want to?